Less Dicks More Pizzas

I had an epiphany today as I scarfed down a Hawaiian pizza all by myself. Pizza is the best friend you could hope for. When people are letting you down, pizza doesn't.

Pizza is only a phone call away. Pizza shows up when it says it will. Pizza is warm and comforting. Sometimes pizza even comes with an order of chicken wings. I love chicken wings. Everyone loves chicken wings. Pizza isn't just there when times are good. Pizza is still by your side the next morning when you really need a friend. Pizza doesn't judge.

My goal in life is to be less of a dick and more of a pizza, because that's what the world needs. Less dicks and more pizzas.

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